Colour Log

[queenofminiskirts]

Akashi Kaoru | Red | #FF8080

Threads are listed in reverse chronological order. Rows highlighted like this are newly added threads started in the previous AC month but only reached an impactful point this month. Dates are in OOC dates because it's just easier that way for me.

Month
08/20	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
08/19	►	Ah...having Shiho back is so reassuring. There's so much she needs to tell her!] DESCRIPTION
08/17	►	Honestly. How many times do I have to say it? If you're upset you can say it. Aren't you surrounded by people who care about you right now? What are you doing, acting like this in front of your new husband! DESCRIPTION
08/13	►	We've got it a little better. The ones who have it worst are the espers who can't do anything, or the ones who are under Black Phantom's control. DESCRIPTION
08/09	►	...we've never been apart for longer than a few days since we were five. DESCRIPTION
08/04	►	...I may have also declared my intention to fight Black Phantom on an illegally hijacked international broadcast while Black Phantom has control over Babel and probably most of the world governments. DESCRIPTION
08/04	►	She wants to say 'no' that she's fine! Because she doesn't want anyone to worry! ...but she realizes that that's what Minamoto tended to do and she's never liked it when he did that. DESCRIPTION
08/04	►	And even if Sensei wanted to be sensitive to his feelings he didn't need to come all the way out here. You have as much of a right to stay in the town as he does! DESCRIPTION
July
07/04	►	She batted the tree branch away but...she could feel the power wasn't answering her immediately. Even without that, fighting with a potential head injury was a bad idea. She batted the tree branch away but...she could feel the power wasn't answering her immediately. Even without that, fighting with a potential head injury was a bad idea.
07/04	►	Thank you for sharing this with me. DESCRIPTION
07/06	►	he's the person who helped raise us. the person whose expectations i want to live up to. DESCRIPTION
07/04	►	Love can be pretty complicated. Sometimes talking about it helps us figure things out. DESCRIPTION
07/04	►	If you're tired, then let's go back now and instead of a victory pose we can do some victory cuddles! DESCRIPTION
00/00	►	I don't know everything but I know enough to know that things have been hard for you...but it's been hard for him too. So...please, don't stop believing that he cares about you. DESCRIPTION
07/23	►	You really need to take better care of yourself, Rin. DESCRIPTION
June
00/00	►	if it's something big like that...then i also can't imagine a version of me that wasn't an esper. all the suffering i'd gone through wouldn't have happened if i didn't have this power. DESCRIPTION
06/25	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
06/24	►	She couldn't help but be reminded of Minamoto and the way he acted like a fussy grandmother. It would have made her feel a little homesick even before, but given all the stuff that had happened when she went home recently...it was more than just a little this time. DESCRIPTION
06/24	►	QUOTE Kaoru tries comforting Archer.
06/20	►	and don't mention it. i get what it's like to miss people and worry about them. Kaoru lends her mirror to Noctis.
06/20	►	QUOTE Kaoru comes back from her canon update and ends up having to explain some things to Caramia.
May
05/10	►	Whatever happens, I'll try to figure out how to beat it but if I can't then I'll make a strategic retreat and come back with reinforcements. Shen Qingqiu worries. Kaoru tries to be reassuring.
05/10	►	She pauses for a split second before remembering that...she really shouldn't take offense to that sort of question. Though no one has asked her that so far, it would probably be a normal question to ask someone with powers like hers. Utena asks Kaoru if she's human and she does her best to not take offense.
05/09	►	There are people who don't think well of espers where I'm from. People who think we're dangerous because they're ruled by fear or ignorance. But...ESP is a power that brings happiness. I believe that and there are other people who do too. It may not always be easy...but I'm happy I was born an esper. Kaoru meets Uki, another girl with psychic powers.
05/07	►	That's why I said, you'd be protecting each other, right? At least with us, it will never just go one way. And I'm sure it's the same for others. Just help us watch our backs so we can watch yours. Wei Wuxian has certain misgivings about his own ability to protect others.
05/07	►	QShe knows, there was a time when she wouldn't have been able to talk about this, because she knows no one would believe her. But she now, she just clasps her hands at her back. Kaoru talks to Lan Wangji about her upbringing.
05/07	►	Maybe that's why it still catches her off guard, when she's asked things like this. Because Shen Qingiu was definitely not in that first category...but neither he nor the other people here seem to fit neatly into the second one either. A game of Never Have I Ever with Shen Qingqiu takes a rather somber turn.
April
00/00	►	She wasn't happy to get an embrace back. She wanted to be, but the feeling that filled her chest instead was something far more hollow. But she only clutches Mami tighter. DESCRIPTION
00/00	►	And, unable to feel any joy, remembering Minamoto only hurts because she misses him a lot. She has to look away to steady herself. Okay. Maybe talking about home wasn't the best idea right now. DESCRIPTION
04/22	►	She says it insistently, almost defensively. She can't help it. She feels off-kilter. And somehow this subject is worse when she can't laugh it off. DESCRIPTION
04/22	►	She can still tease him mostly because she can't help it but there's no genuine energy in it. But she keeps smiling anyway. She thought, if she could keep smiling maybe then she'll feel something. DESCRIPTION
04/22	►	"Because you did something terrible and you'll have to live with it your entire life." And she knows what he's like, knows how kind he is. "Because it must have been painful, right?" DESCRIPTION
04/10	►	just like how sensei wants to be an adult that makes others lives easier, i want to be the kind of adult that won't let these things go and wait for someone else to worry about it. Kaoru tells Shen Qingqiu about her plan to enter the forest.
04/06	►	but you must also have someone you care about, right? you can deny it if you want here, but you should let them know. Kaoru meets Choubee, the Tsundere With A Hair-Pulling Kink.
March
03/30	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
03/28	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
03/24	►	But she still looked at the building sadly, thinking of the dragon buried there. She claps her hands together in a brief prayer. She'll come back to dig it up later. Kaoru and Tristan escape from a burning building. Then take a moment of silence for the dead.
03/24	►	...if possible, I'd rather not kill it. Kaoru and Maribelle take down a dragon. They don't want to kill it but...they're prepared to take responsibility for their actions.
03/23	►	But she had heard Pyra's plea and while she hadn't gotten to say what she wanted to after 'don't' she's heared the tone, and seen her expression and it's not hard to assume that what she meant to say probably was the opposite of 'don't let it get away!' So she places herself between Pyra and the dragon, holding out her hands and forming a barrier around them that keeps the flames away. They can still feel the heat of it because she doesn't want to overuse her powers in a situation like this but they won't be burnt by them. The reason didn't matter. If Pyra wanted to get rid of this dragon without hurting it then Kaoru will help.
03/20	►	"You're allowed to be sad, you're allowed to miss him." She turns a little, uses her free hand to turn his face towards her. "I miss him too. I miss every person who's left this place that I had come to care about. I know they're better off at home and I wouldn't wish for them to come back but all the same...I miss them." Dex and Kaoru reminisce about Guren and the nature of grief and letting go.
03/23	►	If only I were stronger... Kaoru, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji deal with a dragon.
03/14	►	QShe hasn't lived through war, but she's seen it through Fujiko's gaze via the Fujiko Documents. She knows...'something gives' could be everyone being done with war or it could be a nuclear bomb being dropped on a city. And...it could even be a special task force quietly executed in the shadows before they're promoted post-mortem and buried so no one knows any better. Kaoru and Ardyn talk about war on the forums.
03/09	►	Don't say it's irrelevant! No one would want to see someone they care about say that their own suffering is irrelevant! Kaoru meets Lan Wangji in Wei Wuxian's body.
03/09	►	It seems like people have the same habits across worlds. Unreasnable fear of people with certain powers is a touchy point for Kaoru so when Magilou brings it up she can't help but lament about human nature.
03/09	►	Kaoru's feelings about her powers were often complicated and rarely consistent. But moments like this, when she can bring such obvious joy to someone else, there's no part of her that doesn't believe her power was a blessing, that, truly, ESP was a power that could bring happiness. Kaoru takes Nero flying.
03/09	►	...this power is mine. It's been the reason for the greatest injustices and cruelties I've suffered, but it's also...been the reason for all the best things in my life too and the reason I've been able to save others. So I don't want to reject it. Before doing a body swap, Kaoru feels like she should explain the potential consequences of her power to Shen Qingqiu. To absolutely no one's surprise, he's Very Concerned.
03/05	►	She's happy to hug Pyra for...quite a while, actually. The only reason she pulls back is because she can't teach her to dance like this. Kaoru teaches Pyra the dance for Over the Future.
03/05	►	Both my mom and my sister are really busy with work. Their schedules are really hectic and not to mention they get into scandals pretty much every other month and then need to find some obscure place to lay low. So, before I met Shiho and Aoi, we almost never celebrated on my actual birthday and sometimes I might not even see them at all. So...I'll be happy as long as I get to celebrate with everyone. Shen Qingqiu asks what Kaoru wants for her birthday.
03/05	►	I never really noticed back home...but I think this is the first time I've met Shiho's friends. It's usually the other way around. Xie Lian is a wall flower and Kaoru never gets tired of talking about Shiho.
03/04	►	You're one the reasons I'm happy here too! I'm glad I got to become friends with you! Pyra and Kaoru visit the hotsprings and spend some time bonding.
February
02/18	►	Because I want to become stronger. I don't want to feel helpless when there are people around me who need help. Kaoru goes to ask Shen Qingqiu to take her on as a disciple.
02/16	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
02/11	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
00/00	►	She wasn't worried he wouldn't take her hand. All the same, she couldn't help but feel warm and happy that he did. She squeezes his hand back with a bright smile. Jion comforts a shadow of Kaoru's past.
02/09	►	She doesn't ask further. She knows herself, that since none of them were really allowed to go home, none of them really knew what their childhood bedrooms looked like in the years between leaving for Babel and then coming to live in Minamoto's apartment. Description
02/09	►	It clearly matters to you. But she doesn't say that and doesn't push. She all but promised she wouldn't. If he doesn't want to talk about it then they'll find another way out. Kaoru and Berkut wander in a castle and, despite the impression she gives, she does know when to let a subject drop.
02/09	►	QUOTE Kaoru loves learning more about her friends.
02/09	►	I'm sure...you'd pat them on the head and show them kindness.... So, please...spare a little bit of kindness for yourself, okay? Kaoru just wants Shen Qingqiu to love himself a bit more.
02/09	►	She's angry. At this place for causing this, at him for telling her not to worry like he was fine, at herself for being unable to do anything except feel angry and protective and ultimately useless. Kaoru ends up inside Wei Wuxian's heart and she hates that she can't do more to help.
02/05	►	But...she was actually a bit happy that he says he likes them. Even if she's not sure she believes him. Kaoru makes Dex chocolates. They are about the quality she had feared they'd be (but sort of hoped they wouldn't be all the same).
02/05	►	She can't know his thoughts but all the same this is a memory she's sure she'll cherish forever. Kaoru and Shiho serenade Shen Qingqiu and then force him to sing and dance with them. To their surprise, they don't actually have to twist his arm to make it happen.
02/04	►	It's not that I don't trust other people and I know I don't have to be the one to say them, but I...can't help it. When I think someone might be hurt...my body just moves. It's like an instinct. Kaoru explains (but also doesn't totally explain) the Queen Sense to Shen Qingqiu.
02/03	►	QUOTE Val catches Kaoru brooding...then they get into an argument about what is most important in a person.
02/02	►	"Don't worry. She'll understand." She's so certain of it both because Kohaku is a sweetheart and because she can't imagine a single reason why anyone would hate Rin. "And no matter what happens, I'll have your back." Kaoru gives Rin advice and also reassurances.
January
01/20	►	She watches him for a moment. As much as she wants to think she's all grown up, there are some situations where she doesn't know what to say to make things better. Thinking about what Minamoto would do in this case seemed useless. So...what would Fujiko-san do? Shen Qingqiu is hallucinating and what starts out as teasing leads to sadder thoughts and then Kaoru decides the solution is to get him drunk.
01/19	►	There's a flare of protective anger at that. Because this place always did that. Taking advantage of their weaknesses, of the things they care about the most and use it against them. She wishes she had smashed the mirror when she had the chance. Look, Kaoru would fight the world for her friends. Just try her, Mr. F! See what happens!
01/18	►	I hate that sort of kindness. It's too cruel. Even if we're going to argue about what to do about that future...even if we failed to do anything at all, I'd rather know than be kept in the dark. Shen Qingqqiu talks about Luo Binghe and futures and how adults have to shoulder everything. Kaoru breaks down a literal wall to argue with him about it.
01/09	►	"If I'm ever tired, I know there are people I can lean on. That's why, as long as everyone else is here, I won't give up!" [...] "As long as everyone else is here, I'll keep smiling, no matter what happens." Maribelle is worried...Kaoru does her best to reassure her that everything will be fine.
01/09	►	i'll admit, you definitely hide it well. but if you weren't kind, you wouldn't pay so much attention or care so much about all this, right? Kyrie gets called out for being a softy.
01/06	►	i can't really tell. but i'm sure, even if we don't remember, some part of us still know about this place and the people we met here! even if this place can take the memories, they can't take our feelings. Kaoru and Riku talk about what might happen when they leave this place.
01/06	►	i mean, it's nice that he's comfortable with teasing me back. that part is fun. but i also kind of miss how flustered he got before. guess we can't have it both ways... Kaoru meets Vriska and they discuss Izuku and Todoroki.
01/05	►	you understand! it's a big part of her charm point! One thing Kaoru appreciates about Minato is how he appreciates Shiho.
01/05	►	if he says 'no' then it's 'no'. whether it's his answer because it's the truth or because of another reason doesn't even matter. Damian and her discuss Izuku.
01/04	►	QUOTE Kaoru finds a kindred spirit in Wei Wuxian.
01/04	►	"You're not her. Yuuri-chan...she saved herself. She's trying to learn to forgive herself so...don't you dare use her face like that! I won't fall for it!" Hunting demons with Mogget led to an interesting encounter.
01/04	►	QUOTE Akira and Kaoru swap powers.
01/04	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
01/02	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
December
00/00	►	She arrives and doesn't make a joke of it and just knocks on the door like a normal person. When it opens she's smiling, a little sheepish but trying to be reassuring. Since she ran off she felt she owed it to Akira to tell him why.
00/00	►	Rin. I can't stay here. If I get a fever I'll lose control of my powers. If I reach my limit, my body will collapse on itself and I'll take out a 15km radius with me. I can't risk that. Kaoru and Rin have a talk about her powers.
00/00	►	I'm sick because I was running around an ice palace without shoes. If it's anyone's fault it's that stupid shut in's! And even if they're related you don't need to be here! If you're here then what was even the point of coming all the way out here!? Kaoru wants to keep everyone safe. Wei Wuxian follows her and Shiho.
00/00	►	QUOTE Kaoru has a wish for Lux.
November
11/25	►	She wouldn't cry before, because she couldn't be weak like that. But now? Now there are definitely tears in her eyes. Crying from relief is okay. Kaoru finds Maribelle, who is frozen solid. She cries when a kiss was able to help her.
00/00	►	Her heart breaks a little. Because she knows what that feels like--she's seen others who thought like that and no matter how old she gets, how much time passes it's like a fresh wound every time she sees it. Turns out, she and Lux have a lot more in common than she expected.
11/24	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
11/24	►	Was that flash of red worrying? Not really. He seems like a kind person so why would she worry? Kaoru helps to destroy a throne but also gets to learn about Wei Wuxian's cool powers.
11/16	►	QUOTE FOREST EXPLORATION
00/00	►	Okay fine, you got me. But you know, it wasn't just me. Wild Cat was there too. Landing that airplane all by myself would have been too hard. Kaoru accidentally lets one secret out...at least Lux is cute.
11/11	►	She watches Sinistra for a moment. She can recognize that look. She, Shiho and Aoi had looked like that, once upon a time. Back then, if someone had tried to take them from her, regardless of the reasons, she'd probably have thrown them into a wall. Kaoru is called in as backup.
11/10	►	QUOTE Kaoru is always excited to meet another UA student.
11/15	►	'I'm not dangerous.' That's not something she can say with any confidence. But...to not defend her powers is to not defend everyone else who had that power and she can't do that. Some hypothetical questions from Wei Wuxian brings up Kaoru's insecurities.
11/10	►	Kaoru would never claim to be the sharpest or most perceptive (that was Aoi and Shiho respectively), but she's always had good instinct when it comes to people in distress--finding them and reaching out to them. She's glad to see this person relax, is glad that though she has no answers to give, at least she can do this much. So she manages to smile. Kaoru meets Alexa and holds her hand like the serial handholder she is.
11/10	►	"Don't be too bothered by it. This place likes to play with our insecurities." Kaoru meets Nero...their mirrors are also there.
00/00	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
Ocotber
10/21	►	It's what's best for him so I can't say it's all bad. Kaoru is not really over Kirishima but she'd rather focus on Todoroki and Midoriya's love life anyway.
10/21	►	QUOTE Kaoru decides to play hero and rescue Kisa from the maze.
10/20	►	It's because people aren't meant to be alone. We want to find people who understand us and care about us. And hand holding is part of that, right? It's reassuring to know that if we reach out, someone would take our hand. Warning: gratuitous handholding.
10/20	►	So you're Ari! Shiho told me about you! Kaoru meets one of Shiho's friends.
10/09	►	...usually people give something sweet. It doesn't matter if it's good or not. Kaoru does her best to have a conversation about sardines but she...doesn't like it so it's hard.
10/07	►	Probably isn't good enough. But she hesitates. She and Shiho have told so many lies at this point about how she seems to know so much it was practically a running joke. Shiho has been the apprentice to a seafloor specialist, a magical creatures specialist, a castle architect, a doctor and who knows what. She's lost count. But she doesn't want to lie to Guren... Guren comes back from the forest colourless...and then she involves Shiho.
10/07	►	I want to help create a world where espers can freely go to places like amusement parks and school, where no child will grow up being told they're a monster just because they're born with powers. And I think Babel is the best place to make that happen. Kaoru have a conversation with Guren about Babel and Special Duty Espers...after a brief pumpkin fight.
10/07	►	Kyousuke is...complicated. He's weird and tries too hard to pretend to be cool and he's a criminal who has done bad things, but he's always been kind to us...and he'd never hurt a child especially if they have powers. Probably the most serious conversation she's ever had about Hyoubu so far.
10/07	►	QUOTE Kaoru and Maribelle get to know each other better.
10/07	►	Can I just say that you're even prettier than I imagined~? Kaoru loves meeting new people...especially when said new person is a cute girl(?).
10/07	►	No one has ever told her the way she names her attacks add a nice flourish. Mostly, Minamoto just told her they were unnecessary. She is so pleased that someone appreciates them! Kaoru and Zelda take on some skeletons!
September
09/24	►	This was not long after I started middle school, before we met Feather. She was the one who did the most to steer the future away from the predicted disaster. DESCRIPTION
09/24	►	Right after it happened, I thought for sure they'd never look at me the same again and it's true that they didn't know what to do about me but...it wasn't that bad. I was just projecting my own feelings onto them. DESCRIPTION
09/24	►	QUOTE Maribelle gets some context for why Kaoru called her own powers that of a monster's.
09/24	►	It'd be nice if people weren't similar in other worlds like this. But there must be people who don't think like that, right? Discrimination. It sucks and Kaoru wish it existed less.
09/23	►	I know that now. I don't think...I always did. I'm not sure I ever would have considered it if it weren't for Aoi and Shiho. Minato gets to see a memory of Minamoto. The past continues to be difficult to talk about but at least this time it's not totally depressing.
09/023	►	I won't let it. It took a lot just to secure a blank future for everyone, I won't let things go Black Phantom's way. I will definitely protect the future Feather has entrusted to us. A lazy morning turns into an uncomfortable conversation about the future.
09/23	►	Out of all the memories she'as had to relive, this was the hardest to deal with. Because it wasn't something done to her, it wasn't something she just had to laugh off and convince everyone else it was no big deal...but this wasn't the same. Black Phantom is always a touchy subject, honestly...
09/23	►	When he reaches for her she does something she hasn't done since she was ten, that she had never done whenever he was close: she flinches. But it's stupid, she knows it is, but there's a lingering anger in her chest that she thought she was done feeling and fear that had plagued her every day between Suma putting that stupid shock collar on them and Minamoto becoming their supervisor. DESCRIPTION
09/23	►	I just think...maybe she never had anyone like that and maybe if she did she might have been able to escape her past too. DESCRIPTION
09/09	►	Look, she's trying not to comment because she feels like only children blurt out all the questions they think of but Kaoru has always been bad at keeping out of other people's business and she's seen enough family's with problems (too many) that she can't help but want to do something. Kaoru is nosy but it's only because she wants to help...so she ends up asking about Sasuke's family.
09/09	►	Of course he made it out okay! But you know that's not the point, right? He's so busy protecting everyone...but I don't think he's even putting in half the amount of effort to make sure he's okay himself. Yuu and Kaoru argue about whether or not Guren is bad at taking care of himself...and in the process, Kaoru wonders if she needs to worry about Yuu too.
09/09	►	She reaches out to take one of her hands and turns it palm up. Then, with a finger, she slowly traces the characters of her own name as if introducing herself again. Then she holds out her own hand, palm up, smiling encouragingly. Kaoru meets Kisa, who doesn't talk. But they're able to communicate despite it.
09/08	►	But at least they get to hold hands!! Okuni allows Kaoru to hold her hand despite there being no flying happening. She's tsun about it but that's fine with Kaoru.
August
08/05	►	She looks back at the flower crown sitting on the edge of the well. There's so much regret, so many things she wished she had said, but she focuses instead on the sort of face Kirishima would no doubt be making if he saw this and that bit of humour eased the feeling choking her. Kaoru has some goodbyes she still wants to say. Shiho goes along with this not!funeral service.
08/05	►	So it means a lot to me, to know that there's someone here who will scold me when I'm doing something stupid, someone who, even though no one asked him to, cares about the people around him and tries to protect them. Kaoru has some honest words for Guren.
08/02	►	I hadn't understood why at the time but I think...I get it now. It's because he wanted her to be able to live her dream and she wanted the same for him. Because that was how much they loved each other. That's why, especially because he's so important to me, I'm not going to cry! Because the place he needs to be, isn't here, right? Ochako comes over to make sure Kaoru is fine.
July
07/21	►	For a high level esper like me, Babel isn't just my workplace, it's an organization that will help me learn to control my powers and support me in any way it can...and not just me but other espers too. It's the only place that does that in Japan. DESCRIPTION
07/21	►	She sees that smile and it makes her own dim. Obviously there was something else there, but well. She didn't want to push and maybe the best thing she can do to help is by helping change the subject. DESCRIPTION
07/21	►	But, you know, I have Minamoto. He's someone whose expectations I always want to meet, because he was the first person who ever believed in me. DESCRIPTION
07/17	►	and thanks. for being someone shiho can trust. sorry for worrying you. DESCRIPTION
07/17	►	then you probably needed it. you seem like the kind of person who wouldn't talk about these things otherwise. DESCRIPTION
07/17	►	I considered the risks but I assumed I could protect them no matter what happened. I should know better than to think like that after everything I've seen. And I should have trusted you more and come to you sooner. DESCRIPTION
07/17	►	hey, i'm back and all of us are safe. you can call off the coast guard now. i'm sorry you had to be the one to do that. when you're awake i'll come apologize properly. DESCRIPTION
07/18	►	It was because I loved you two so much that I realized I didn't have to hate myself. That it didn't matter what bad thing I had done before or who might be afraid of me as long as I had the power to protect the two of you. A talk about heroes turns into a talk about their childhood which turns into a talk about the hero Red Riot.
07/17	►	I'm here. I'm sorry I left like that. I...can't promise I won't do anything stupid ever again because I'm not really that smart, Rin. But I'll try not to, okay? And you won't lose me. I'll always come back, okay? No matter what... DESCRIPTION
07/10	►	She's going to lean over and try to pull him into a hug. It would probably be awkward at this angle except she doesn't have to stay grounded and can shift the angle of her body accordingly by holding herself slightly off the ground. "It'll be okay. We'll figure it out together with everyone." DESCRIPTION
07/08	►	screw that guy. he doesn't get to decide what your future is going to be. your future is yours and no one else's. he can take his vision and choke on it. DESCRIPTION
07/04	►	"It's fine! I'm probably not even his type anyway. If word about this got back to him he'd probably just tell everyone we're just friends who bonded over our mutual love of the colour red!"...now that she's said it, she can't help but feel a bit irritated towards Imaginary!Kirishima. Kaoru talks about her feelings for Kirishima, vol. ???
07/04	►	...but is it love? Mi--the guy I liked back home. He was always telling me it was just a childish crush, that it was something I would grow out of. I was the only one who ever insisted it was more than that. What if this is proof that I was wrong? Look, Minamoto was good for many things. This was not one of them.
07/04	►	"I'm already very happy though." She's reaching out for his hand, hoping to take it in hers. "No matter what happens now, whether Ei-chan likes me back like that or not, I'm really happy to have so many great friends." Kaoru talks about her feelings for Kirishima, vol 1.
June
06/30	►	It just feels like I should be able to do more than that. I don't always want to be a child who needs to be protected. Dex comes back to life.
06/24	►	Honestly, the moment she saw this she had wanted to curl into a ball and cry. Dex, whom Shiho had been able to trust with her secrete and Dave and-- But the feeling was there and gone because tears won't fix anything, because she wasn't going to be the little girl she had been at five who could only cry when the people around her are hurting. Kaoru learns that Dex died. She's sad but that takes backseat when there are people she needs to take care of.
06/24	►	(Even though by the end a pit of dread had settled in her gut, as if she didn't even believe he'd be back. She ignored it. It was a baseless fear. It wasn't any kind of esper intuition. Just because Shiho couldn't find him anywhere didn't necessarily mean he wasn't ever going to come back either.) Akira dies...then comes back.
06/18	►	so. don't freak out. but it turns out our uniforms can't defend against werewolf bites. or well, not the...what are the really sharp teeth at the front called again? Kaoru does hate to make Shiho worry...
06/17	►	She's still frowning but even she knows that if she kept arguing about how he should feel about this it'd be selfish. It wasn't her place to make him blame her. Sleep-deprived, Kaoru nearly drops something on Nyx.
06/17	►	She's so damn exhausted but she's not going to stop smiling. (Or rather, it's because she's exhausted and worry that she won't let herself stop smiling.) Ochako and Kaoru have both turned into werewolves and that sucks but at least they don't have to deal with it alone.
06/17	►	"It's not!" It would never be okay...the thought made her ears press flat against her head. :Don't say it's okay. I don't--" Some instinct in her was screaming prey and it was hard to keep it at bay and she wasn't sure how long she could do it. "I don't want this." Dextera continues with his habit of finding Kaoru at a Bad Time.
06/11	►	She returned the squeeze in her grip when Ochako brought up Momo. Even though it may have been selfish, Kaoru did miss Momo and Iida. Even though she knew they were home and among all their friends and family it was a bit...lonely to think she'd never see them again. But she didn't plan on dwelling on that and her eyes are practically sparkling when Ochako continued. Something sad came up but mostly? It was a happy conversation about love and first kisses. As far as Kaoru's concerned, Ochako is living the highschool life!
00/00	►	It's not about if you can defend yourself or not. We're a team, right? That means if someone bothers you I'm supposed to kick their ass. That's how this works. DESCRIPTION
06/11	►	It'll be fine, look! No one's even paying attention to us. Everyone else is too busy having fun on their own! Kaoru "convinces" Rin to dance. (Not that he had much choice in the matter.
06/10	►	That was so long ago, but Shiho is one of the kindest people I know and she's more delicate than she'd like people to think. So she's always caught between wanting to protect herself and wanting to be honest because she doesn't want to hurt anyone or make them feel like she was taking advantage of their trust. So I'm glad that there's someone else she can trust here. Shiho finally tells someone about being a psychometer and Kaoru can't be happier for her.
06/10	►	But okay, she can't stop herself from cracking a smile or from bursting into laughter. She brings a hand up to smother it but remembering the face Guren made when Kyrie handed his prize over was just too much. Bonding over pranks and embarrassing people.
06/10	►	She tries to hold onto her severe expression! But she fails pretty quickly and just laughs at him. Kaoru meets Eliot and decides she needs to help him learn to enjoy the party.
06/10	►	But...there is so much that's weird here...she isn't sure what to address first. A weirdo gives Kaoru a handmade knife and tells her she should stab perverts with it. She's honestly not sure what to think about that but he seems nice enough...
06/10	►	No one takes breaks at a party, Guren-san! You're supposed to keep partying until you pass out. Kaoru drags Guren out to the dance floor.
06/09	►	She heads straight for where she heard him and--stops dead in her tracks. Her hands are balled into tight fists and she looks positively murderous. Kaoru feels the punishments for failing the last quest was too much...but since Akira isn't acting upset over it she's being upset enough for both of them.
06/05	►	She hadn't been sure he'd remember [what Level 7 meant]...though she wasn't surprised at all that he did. There were some things that make homesickness a bit more bearable. Having people laugh at a world-specific joke is one of those things. A nice, home-cooked meal with friends is lovely too.
06/05	►	It can be hard sometimes...but it's a bit easier, knowing that there are people who believe in us like that. Kaoru shares a painful memory with Rin, safe in the knowledge that even if they came from different places he'd understand
06/05	►	It made her feel better, to have someone at her back and that temporary comfort helped. He wasn't Shiho or Aoi, wasn't Minamoto, but she wasn't alone and that was enough to calm her down. Kaoru doesn't fear many things, but that's not the same as fearing nothing. But well, it helps to have someone there with her.
06/03	►	all we're missing is cheese? that's it?! that's great! you're great! i was beginning to think i'd forget what pizza even tasted like... Kaoru has very simple needs. One of those needs is pizza.
May
05/28	►	She sounds so certain that she's right, but her grip on him was a bit tighter than it needs to be, like the hand still at her side that was balled into a tight, trembling fist. She wanted to find Shiho so badly, but she couldn't be impulsive and she wasn't about to stand around letting other people do it either. Kaoru talks someone out of going into the forest.
05/28	►	She blinks. She would have blushed for just about anyone else, but Caramia was like Fujiko-san and Kyousuke so it was less embarrassing. She didn't expect the way his antics made her laugh. She was still worried about Shiho--and everyone else but, at least for a moment, things weren't quite that bad. Caramia is a dork but it helps Kaoru worry a little less.
05/28	►	"I know it wouldn't be because of the photo. It's the person in it that matters, right?" Just like how she hadn't been tempted by a music box with a picture frame in the lid but by who was featured in that picture. Turns out her housemate not only has a friend but a childhood best friend.
05/16	►	He must be a wonderful person for you to like him so much. Kaoru meets Mika, who is without his best friend.
05/00	►	QUOTE DESCRIPTION
05/14	►	You're hurt and maybe...maybe you think you deserve that. That this is your burden to carry. That it's your fault. Kaoru and Rin talk about the past.
05/12	►	I love you so much, Shiho. I wish I didn't have to make you worry like this. Kaoru tells Shiho about her request to Guren for ESP suppression drugs.
05/05	►	and look out for yourself too! you're both my friends! so make sure you both come back safely or i won't let you hear the end of it! Kaoru is worried about her best friend going into the forest without her...but actually she's just worried about everyone.
05/05	►	But the moment Kirishima's name is brought up her entire being freezes and her mind goes completely blank. Did he just say--was she supposed to...!? Just a friendly game of Hot or Not...except Kaoru and Shiho can't play a friendly game without making it awful.
05/05	►	That's not your fault. You're only a child, Emma. I'm sure you did everything you could. What started as a lesson on how to shorten skirts turns into a discussion about uniforms and childhood trauma.
05/05	►	What was it Minamoto had said before? It'll be fun when you've learned something new...that's what I want to teach you girls. She sort of understood that a bit more now. Dextera teaches Kaoru to play chess.
05/05	►	He was a telepath and a precog. He was the one who made the prediction and since he's a Level 7 esper, it's supposed to mean the future he predicted can't be changed. But we hadn't wanted to give up. Even though in the end...it felt like we barely managed to do anything. Kaoru and Akira talk while stargazing and something...she honestly hadn't talked about with anyone comes up.
05/04	►	I don't want anyone to approach me if something goes wrong. I don't want anyone to be hurt because of me. Unable to find someone who could make her an ECM Kaoru has to explore less...safe alternatives in case something goes wrong with her powers.
05/04	►	Kirishima did seem to like it when things were lively. And geez, what was she doing acting like she didn't want him there? Was she really this affected by how little sleep she's gotten lately? That's probably what it was, wasn't it? She was just acting weird because she was so sleep-deprived! Kaoru's not sure what's going on but she doesn't even entertain the possibility that she's developing a crush.
April
04/29	►	Well, you can always count on us! After all, if we can do things that others can't, it must be for the purpose of helping others. Shiho and Kaoru agree to help Deku with something.
04/25	►	when we're together it's like we can do anything! Kaoru tells Deku about her best friends.
04/24	►	Honestly, she had gone straight to Shiho when she left the forest to get the banshee hair to her and also to get herself checked out for anything that might have lingered in her head. She knew she couldn't risk not doing it. She knew all the risks involved with having something in your head, after all. But now she wished she had stayed around the forest to see if everyone made it out all right instead... Kaoru realizes she needs to step up her game if she wants to protect her new friends. (BACKDATED)
04/23	►	Even thinking about it, made her feel warm and nostalgic. Maybe the ending had been a bit forced, maybe it had been naive, but Kaoru, like the rest of their class, had liked it better. And she did believe that, above all else, love was a powerful force that could overcome even the darkest hatred. She, Shiho and Iida all share stories that have a moral that is meaningful to them.
04/21	►	She wasn't sure what to do when he started coughing either. What she has seen on tv indicated she should rub his back, but since she had never been sick and so never been taken care of like this she wasn't...sure if that would help. (She reached out to rub his back anyway, just in case.) Kaoru isn't sure what's happened to Caramia, but she's determined to help.
04/21	►	This is probably the most normal conversation she's had since the shadows stared to get more aggressive. It was a nice little distraction. A bit of a normal conversation admist a week of not being able to sleep and constantly being attacked by her shadow helps.
04/21	►	Minamoto had raised her better than this. And, though she's keeping it a secret, she is reflecting poorly on Babel and the Children by behaving like this. She took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. Kaoru is scolded and she realizes she's letting her frustration get the better of her. And her heart hurts to think of the hardships Guren's world had to go through.
04/19	►	There's an unspoken 'but' at the end of that sentence. Because Kaoru was supposed to be the brave one. Because it was her powers, and therefore her responsibility. Still, she would hate it if the situation were reversed, being told to leave despite how much she wanted to stay and help. In the end, Kaoru is really just a teenage girl and its reassuring to know that Dextera who would want to stick by her.
04/16	►	...really, watching Caramia work in the kitchen both eased her homesickness a little while also making it worse. Because if she closed her eyes and just listened to the sounds she could almost imagine herself back in their apartment...but she also thought, he and Minamoto would have gotten along well. Kaoru is homesick but she'd rather not talk about it and pretend she isn't.
04/14	►	i'm glad she's here. when we're together it's like we can do anything! if aoi were here to we'd be unstoppable! Shiho is her strength and even though she still misses Aoi and Minamoto (and everyone, really) Kaoru could be thankful that at least she had Shiho.
04/13	►	[It's strange to imagine a school entrance exam like that...but then, they came from very different worlds, weren't they? But as cool as fighting robots for your school entrance exam is, Kaoru's Female Intuition is sensing something even more interesting. Just some gossiping between friends!
04/10	►	She relaxes a little (feels an odd sort of relief, knowing that he didn't think she was strange) and though her hair didn't go back to floating she does smile at him as she leans over to link their arms. Things with Kirishima are always a bit odd especially because of his enthusiasum when it comes to her powers. But this sort of culture shock isn't going to get in the way of a precious, budding friendship.
04/07	►	And she had said when she signed up, hadn't she? Even if she couldn't fight whatever they found she could protect the people with her. It was a promise and she'll keep it no matter what! Kaoru's had decided long ago that she would use her powers to protect people. She wasn't about to go back on that now.
04/06	►	It's reassuring to read that, to know that someone else not from their world--without the burden of being an esper in a society where most people didn't have and didn't understand psychic powers, felt the same about this issue. It's hard to avoid talking about the more difficult parts about being an esper. But every time she meets someone who understands even if they haven't experienced the same things she did...it gives her hope.
04/06	►	i think love is important. people are not meant to live alone. so we seek out people who understand us and who will love us as a friend, as family or even as someone special. Kaoru shares Minamoto's wisdom with Dextera.
04/05	►	There's really nothing like the power of a new haricut when it comes to creating a new self-image, is there? I did the same thing when I started middle school. Two friends bonding over hairstyles and training and other teen things.
March
03/27	►	"I get it." Because when she had been Emma's age she would have denied needing to talk too. Because she had to be strong for Aoi and Shiho, because she couldn't afford to be weak. Kaoru runs into a situation she had been fairly familiar with as a child...though this time the shoe is on the other foot.
03/25	►	Kaoru's honestly had it up to here with the rude furniture bullying people. When she meets someone who reminds her of someone important in her life she's pretty much done playing nice.
03/25	►	We can't undo our mistakes but we can at least try to fix it.
03/25	►	Old wounds may heal but they still hurt.
03/25	►	A friend looked like they needed a hand...
03/19	►	Kaoru meets someone who misses their friends as much as she does.
03/17	►	People who sit at the dock alone usually need a friend. Kaoru is surprised to find that Rin has very similar experiences to hers.